I got an email from a friend in Southern California today.
I am so looking forward to seeing you next week when you're out here. We have a lot to catch up on. You never told me why you and [Name Withheld] are no longer friends, so I want to talk about that. You two were so close, like brother and sister . . .
Oy. This is going to be hard, especially since I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place to answer any questions this person may have. And I know they will not be the only ones asking, "What happened?" Earlier this year,a long-time and very close friend - and unfortunately, a person whom I introduced to many of my other friends - terminated our friendship.
I can play Monday morning quarterback and say why I think he did so. The problem is, the story involves some rather personal details. Before this former friend dumped me, while we were still friends, there was an agreement between us to keep the facts confidential. However, it creates a situation where should I say, "You know, I really can't talk about it . . .", I can expect some people to assume the worst. Wow, it must have been really, really bad . . . I bet it was due to . . .
And I have a suspicion as to what they think the next word would be. And that is not the case at all.
Oy. I think the easiest thing to do is just say what it isn't and suggest they call or swing by the workplace of [Name Withheld] and ask him. I call that the "Facts of Life" approach:
"Daddy, where do babies come from?
"Go ask your mother."
And then . . . refocus. "Say, how 'about them Dodgers?"
Or . . . say I don't want to discuss it and let people speculate. I cannot be responsible for the inferences they could make. And even more so - I cannot assume they will even make any.